Monday, April 26, 2004


I'm finally doing something this weekend... did all my calls on Sat, went to church today, did GB stuff in Diana's place... Hehehe met the Milkshakes today. They're fun... I'm still the quietest around them, I guess. Sexy mama called, ngobrol & ketawa ketiwi kaya anak sma... =b Watched "The Alamo" yesterday ("Kill Bill vol.2" for the others). One word: sucks. Just don't understand why they still make lousy war movies. I think I snoozed during most of it. I was reminded that I don't like wars. And the thing is, I always link technology with wars (okay I know I'm using computer which is a useful tech product, but that's not the problem here). Nations compete in making new weapons and defense systems, and I'm not that idealistic to assume that they will only use it for bettering the fate of human race. Locke might believe in the innate goodness of humans but there ARE corrupted minds out there. Technology will be used in wars and humans cannot just be labeled as "collateral damage".... maybe I watched too many sci-fi movies, huh? Why do you mind about what people are thinking and not what GOD is thinking? I am, again, as always, a victim of my fear of people's opinion and vindication. These past months I've been telling myself not to mind too much about other people as long as I feel alright inside. Lama2 jadi stress sendiri kalo ngapa2in gua masih harus mikir, "what will they think of me if I do this?" Kalo mereka ngga bisa nerima gua yang kaya gitu, yah that's their problem not mine. But sometimes stuff comes up that my inner voice can't tell right or wrong. It just stays silent and leaves me in utter confusion. Or maybe it's me refusing to listen to the voice. A denial, refusing to face the hard reality and the consequences of my doing.
Rlynn wandered here @ 4/26/2004 01:52:00 PM
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